Stress Testing Sobriety
After 5 years of sobriety, when my pillars of stability crumbled, all I wanted was a drink
This past year tested my sobriety unlike any before.
Abstinence proved itself a professor, my pillars of stability crumbled, and I crawled through dark crevices that I had hoped to never visit again.
The events that mark year 5 of my sobriety include the end of a 4-year relationship, a 1,400-mile move, and a risky career decision that did not unfold according to plan.
On top of those was a surprise diagnosis.
These events stress-tested my sobriety and killed any remaining trace of coward left in me.
Redirection not rejection
The end of our 4-year relationship caught me off guard. I had just walked through the front door. Home from dropping my parents off at the airport. Exhaling, now that I was no longer entertaining. Preparing a mental packing list for the following weekend at a friend’s wedding in Upstate New York.
Then, it happened. The conversation that changed the course of my life.
First came the shock. A denial that created a delusional optimism, which I used to overpromise and overcommit to relationship-saving changes that had…
